The AP and Wireless Week are reporting that Verizon customers in Cleveland are complaining of being billed $1.99 by V erizon for Data Services that they didn’t use.

The problem,  originally received attention by the Cleveland Plains Dealer, a local newspaper, when a reader wrote in to complain about the issue.  Soon another 400 area residents echoed the complaint at which point the Verizon spin machine swung into gear.  Four Verizon executives spent 90 minutes at the newspaper’s offices on Monday including Roger Tang, the company’s regional president for Ohio, Pennsylvania and West Virginia who said Verizon is investigating every complaint, because it doesn’t want to “zing” customers on their bills.

I just love their creative vernacular.  “Zing”.  Why not call it what it really is – theft.  If people actually audited their phone bills every month they would be shocked to discover just how many times their bills are inaccurate in favor of their carrier.  In fact every single time I’ve spent the hour it takes to really specifically audit my own bill I’ve found errors that far exceed $1.99.

This isn’t a case of simple mistakes much as the carriers would like us to believe.  It is a case of theft pure and simple.  These companies add millions and probably even tens of millions in additional revenue to their bottom lines ever year as the result of exactly this sort of thing.  How long, do you suppose, this was going on before someone noticed that they were being billed for a service that they didn’t subscribe to and didn’t use.

And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.  How many of us know which “cost recovery” surcharges are legal and applicable to our bills?  Anyone?  The simple fact of the matter is that carriers can pretty much steal from all of us with impunity and when someone finally wises up and makes a stink they apologize for accidentally “zinging” us and then they rename the now exposed rip-off something else like Universal Cost Recovery Surcharge (recovery from what?  the taxes that they are supposed to pay and which they are levying back onto their customers?) and add another $1.00 to the number and make off with even more of our coin.

Part of the problem with the US these days is the fact that corporations are running roughshod over consumers and the very body that is supposed to be looking out for us, from the President and on to the Senate and Congress are so deep in the pocket of these companies that they may as well simply be on the payroll.

Every day I see a new abuse by a big company and it makes me think that the only way this country will ever get back on its feet is if someone pulls a “fight club” on big business.

Help Me Bring Smiles to these Faces

If you’re anything like me you spend a lot of time traveling for work.  Among other things, this means a lot of nights away from home in hotel rooms.  I’ll bet I’m not the only one whom, as a result of all these hotel-nights, has managed to accumulate quite a supply of personally-sized soaps, shampoos, lotions, conditioners, etc.

In fact many fellow travelers probably have a drawer or a basket under a sink someplace that contains many dozens of these aforementioned supplies.  Perhaps you even thoughtfully put a sampling of these out as a courtesy to house-guests from time to time.  I know I have.

Or really, I should say “used to”.

About three years ago it was brought to my attention by my girlfriend’s family that all these individually wrapped personal care products were perfect for a group of people that needed them far more than either I or my house-guests; underprivileged kids in developing countries all over the world.

When this came up it occurred to me that what for me amounted to a sacrifice of a totally inconsequential nature had the potential to be a gift with great – dare I even say profound significance for others.

In my case the products I was bringing home ended up being carried to Thailand where they were given to an orphanage in a small town in the southern part of Thailand.  To you and I these personal care products are at most a trivial convenience – we don’t experience any direct cost associated with the acquisition or use of these products and aside from making you look like the thoughtful host when your in-laws visit they mainly just take up space under a sink or in a drawer someplace, most likely gathering dust and ultimately destined for the rubbish bin when you do a spring cleaning or need to reclaim their space for something of greater tangible value.

Conversely, to the kids in the orphanage – and in every other place on the planet where there are kids that do not, on a daily basis, have access to things we take for granted – like soap, a toothbrush, shampoo or even a proper bath towel- these items can bring far more than cleaner teeth and skin.

I don’t see how anyone could consider this and not be impacted by the idea that something so basic could be so important.

When I was told that my “care package” had been delivered and that for these kids, many of whom have never had a birthday present or a single item of new clothing or really anything at all that they could consider their own, it was not only a source of improved hygiene, but much more important in my mind, a source of happiness, and a means to some improved self esteem, it became a mission for me to increase my impact in this simple but positive way – to take this same care package idea and extend it beyond a single orphanage and expand it to include many more kids in many more places.

You see, having a little pride in oneself, experiencing  the transformation from being unkempt to smelling nice and having clean teeth is something that all humans from all cultures can understand.  Everyone has experienced the difference in mental climate a hot shower and a warm bed can provide even on the worst day.

For me, the idea that some of these kids – through no fault of their own – have simply never had even a glimmer of these simple pleasures affects me deeply.  It also motivates me that it is possible through my own small efforts that one child at a time, I can actually make a difference.

These days I’m a bit more aggressive in my efforts to collect the individual soaps and shampoos and other supplies that the hotels I stay at provide for me.  For my own use I either bring my own products or at most open and reuse a single soap during my travel.  I make sure to pack up whatever products are provided each day so that I get a fresh supply each time my room is made up and I frequently ask the housekeeper for additional product.

When I tell them why I want extra stuff they all, without exception, are only too happy to load me up with whatever I can fit in my bag.  Hotel management might not like this practice too much, but for what they charge per night in a decent hotel they can afford a few cents extra so I can bring smiles to a few more faces.

Anyway, this got me thinking – if I could have the impact that I do all by myself, what would happen if I enlisted the efforts of my fellow tech-industry travelers?  That’s the real point of this post.  I want your help.

You don’t have to be as aggressive as I am about it, but if you like the idea of happy smiling kids – of providing something to the underprivileged at no real cost to you and if you want to quietly feel good about something you’re doing every time you’re on the road here’s what you can do:

Don’t waste the product you get in hotels each day.  Open just one or at most two items – use them until they are gone but be sure to put them away each day when you leave the room so the housekeeper gives you fresh products.  Don’t open these new ones.  Just toss them in your toiletries bag or in their own plastic bag (the small plastic bag in your ice bucket will work nicely).  Bring them home and put them in a box.

When the box is full send it to me and I’ll see that it’s delivered to someone who can really appreciate these products.  In many cases the kids will say prayers on your behalf so if you appreciate those sentiments make sure your name is associated with what you’ve sent.

It’s a bonus if you travel business class and can bring back the small toiletries kits you get for the flight – these have even better items including new toothbrushes, combs, socks, etc. that these children need desperately.

Once you have a shoebox worth of stuff, post it to me as follows:

Soap Suds for Kids c/o Oliver Starr
411 West 5th Street #240
Los Angeles CA 90013

Your help will not only make my day, but much more importantly you’ll make the days of many other small people who need and deserve a good day far more than I do.

Please pass this message on and feel free to repost.  The more folks that participate the more smiles we can create, the more self esteem we can foster and the better we can demonstrate that sometimes the smallest of kindnesses can also have the most profound impact upon all concerned.

I guess that the folks at Apple don’t really believe in the first ammendment.  If they did I simply cannot understand why they would refuse to post the following review to the iPhone App Store.  I have looked and cannot see how anything written in the review posted below violates any of their terms for posting reviews yet they have clearly removed it from the store.

This is not nice and should give everyone pause when considering where we should spend our technology dollars.  I am really disappointed in the company – a company that has received a fair bit of my money, too – and would really like a representative from Apple to explain just what it is about this review that is so objectionable that they would remove it from the store:

Please spread this around.  Company’s that censor their customer’s shouldn’t be allowed to get away with it.

As you may know if you’ve read this site previously, I work for the David Allen Company as the Editor of GTDtimes, the community hub for all things GTD.  David, the author of both “Getting Things Done: the art of stress free productivity” and “Making it All Work: winning at the game of work and the business of life” and the rest of the David Allen Company team have been hard at work putting together what may well be one of the most important and valuable conferences you could possibly attend, particularly given the current economic environment and the resulting need to take your productivity and capabilities to a new level not merely to excel but possibly simply to survive.

Here’s why David thinks people should attend the conference in his own words:

Incidentally, much of the original impetus for this even was generated by my late friend Marc Orchant who had spoken passionately of the need for a convocation of GTD practitioners where we could meet, exchange ideas, share stories, educate one another, learn, develop new best practices and help ourselves get closer to that effortless state of truly having a mind like water. I will be there and hope to see many of you there too.

Want Fries with That?

Anyone that has followed the technology scene the past couple of years has probably read about the doings of Sam Sethi.  His reputation as well of the swath of destruction he’s carved through the online mediasphere has been nearly unparalleled.

Beginning with his noisome divorce from Techcrunch UK, subsequently his remarks where he actually threatened a former business associate with grevious bodily injury, followed by his incredible Blognation charade where he basically stole between four and six months of full time blogging efforts by more than a dozen top bloggers (none of whom have ever received so much as a heartfelt apology from Sam, let alone payment as promised in multiple forums).

Recently when speaking with another blogger at an event Sam was asked what the deal was in regards to what happened with Blognation.  It just so happened that a friend of mine was in the vicinity and heard the question and Sam’s response.  He looked the other gentleman in the eye and said:  “It’s simple, really.  I lied.”  Incredible.  The man has no conscience, shows no remorse, cares not what he did to the people who made some big sacrifices on his behalf.  There’s a word for people like this: sociopath.

You’d think that after a debacle like what he did at Blognation he’d have the decency to stay out of tech for a while – like permanently – but some folks have no shame and instead of staying well away from the community that by all rights should treat him like the pariah he truly is, he heard an idea he liked, Twitwall, tried to glom onto it by weaseling his way into someone else’s company, got denied when his track record came to light, and subsequently started a rip-off company, Twitblogs.

This slimy behavior was brought to the fore thanks to Techcrunch but Sam has no shame and he keeps on keeping on.

One of the things that Techcrunch pointed out in its post on the topic is that Twitblogs had no formal privacy policy.  As they pointed out – would you trust your data, let alone your credentials to a guy with Sethi’s track record?  Me neither.

Anyway, earlier today a friend of mine pointed me to Twitblogs new privacy policy:

We will endeavor to write a more comprehensive and complete policy moving forward. Please note that we take the security of your privacy and details very seriously.

Yeah…right…they care about privacy and security so much that they can’t be bothered to borrow some boilerplate that’s been vetted by a company like Yahoo, put their name in there and adhere to that policy at least until Sam gets around to trying to play lawyer and draw up something of his own.

As funny as that is, though, I’ve saved the best for last.  Here’s Sam’s current description of his role  at Twitblogs: 

Sam’s role is to manage the product/features road map and manage our growing list of partners. Twitblogs already has a number of high-level relationships agreements with companies such as Amazon and Sun Microsystems.

It would be interesting to call Sun or Amazon and see if they really have such “high-level” agreements.  Sam said the same thing about Sun and other companies during the blognation disaster and to a one they hadn’t heard of blognation nor Scam Sethi…

This of course begs the question:  what is fact, what is fiction.  From what I can see no one knows. not even Sam…

Caveat: I am not a developer so what I am about to reveal may or may not be news to the developer community.  Nevertheless, this is not something that I was aware of previously and I have not seen any mention of this in the media that I subscribe to (which is a fairly broad cross section of the online press).

Further, to my knowledge this is not something that has been specifically authorized by me in the course of my use of either my computer or the software on it or my iPhone and the software running there.  I did not grant permission for this information to be transferred anywhere and I did not ever to my knowledge see any request to allow this information to be collected much less shared and shared without my knowledge.

Here’s the deal.  Today I was going through the console on my Mac Book Pro trying to see if I can figure out why it suddenly won’t display anything on the screen (I was doing this using LogMeIn since I could not work on the computer locally since the display has apparently died.

During the process of digging through the console to see if there was any obvious cause for the completely unexpected display failure I came across something that I found as unexpected as the aforementioned problem and which I (and possibly other iPhone owners) will find very disturbing.

As you can see, this is a snapshot of my console log file.  It shows some surprising information – at least from my perspective.  Unless I am completely misinterpreting this information it looks as if the iPhone is logging everything that happens to it and I mean everything, from usage stats on the baseband to which applications are installed, when they are used and when they malfunction, and then, when you connect your iPhone to iTunes the phone downloads all this information to your console where it is logged.  Further, judging from the text adjacent to the baseband logging details this information has been “submitted”.

This begs the question: SUBMITTED WHERE???

Again, I wasn’t asked if I wanted this information collected and I sure as hell wasn’t asked if I wanted it submitted either.  If I am correct and what is going on here is that without my prior knowledge let alone my consent this data is being transmitted back to Apple for their own purposes (after all with literally hundreds of crashes of the mobile Safari browser on this iPhone alone, if the data were being used for my benefit someone would have contacted me don’t you think?) using my computer to collect the data and my Internet connection to transport it.

When a Microsoft application crashes and the crash reporter wants to send information back to Microsoft they have the courtesy to ask your permission.  They also take time to explain in writing what is being sent to them and what is being done with it.  They make certain guarantees at this time as well about personally identifying information and how that data is to be used.

I fail to see where such courtesies are being extended to me by Apple.  I fail to see an explanation as to what is being collected, whether or not it is personally identifying or what Apple intends to do with this information once they’ve managed to snoop it from my phone and computer.

Frankly I think this is outrageous.  The fact that this data is being collected at all without requesting permission to do so is bad enough.  The fact that it appears to be sent via clandestine transmission to Apple without any prior disclosure seems to be a criminal trespass based upon my understanding of the privacy laws in this country.

This strikes me as a grotesque abuse of my trust.  What if I had personal medical information stored on my phone?  At this point how would i know who at Apple had accessed this information or with whom it had been shared – again all without my knowledge or consent.

Since when did owning a mobile phone void one’s right to privacy or exempt a company from the need to disclose their data collection policy?  When did Apple wake up and decide that it was okay to spy on their customers in this truly repulsive fashion?

Now, as I said at the outset of this post, I am not a developer so it is possible that either this is something that has previously been discussed and I am late to the party – it is also possible that I am misunderstanding something about these console log statements and that what I think is going on really isn’t.

However, on the off chance that I am neither late to the party nor misunderstanding these log files then this is a real issue that deserves some real attention.  I sincerely doubt that I am alone in feeling completely raped by Apple’s data collection policies and the fact that I don’t appear to have been included in the decision making process about which data will be logged, collected and reported regarding my use of a device that I bought and paid for and for which I have not in any obvious way been notified of zero privacy nor authorized anyone to keep tabs on my beyond my approval for AT$T to track my usage of their network for billing purposes.

Is this grounds for a class action?  I’ll let the lawyers tell me the answer.  Is this grounds for a consumer-company smackdown.  I think it is.  If what I think is going on is really going on then it’s time to put Apple in its place.  The back door was bad enough but this latest is simply egregious.

Perhaps it’s a bit unsporting to go after Sarah Palin  – the much maligned Hockey Mom from Alaska – particularly given that she and her family are know known in some circles as the Wasilla Hillbillies after the way they behaved during the McCain campaign but the news that continues to come to the fore about this person is simply too much to ignore.

The latest – aside from her drama and theatrics which included “going rogue”, refusing to speak to McCain while on the Straight Talk Express (perhaps renamed the “not talking express” or maybe the “stop touching me express” or possibly even the “i’m a third grader express” though that might be insulting to third graders that appear to know more geography then the cartographically challenged Palin who must be one of those “US Americans that needs maps and doesn’t has maps” but I digress.)

No, the latest is that this woman who clearly hasn’t realized that in the gun fight of world politics she’s armed with one of those clown guns with a flag that unfurls from the muzzle with the word “bang” on it – hardly the requisite hardware when even the most minimally armed adversary she’s going to face is packing a howitzer – this polititard apparently can’t even identify Africa on a map of the world and hasn’t quite learned that the aforementioned is a continent and not a country!

It’s somewhat terrifying to think that the person who would be charged with brokering a peace deal in the middle east can’t even find the area on a map.  It’s even more frightening to contemplate what else she simply doesn’t know.  After all it was hardly like we had unfettered access to her to randomly question her about all manner of topics that might be important to carrying out the duties of the POTUS in a competent manner.

I can only wonder what else the McCain staffers know but which they aren’t yet telling.  It has since come out that in addition to her lack of knowledge about the earth she has a profoundly broken sense of ethics.  During the campaign word leaked to the press that Palin had spent some $150,000 of campaign funds at Neiman Marcus outfitting herself from head to toe in high-fashion designer garb so that she could look exactly like that icon of fashion Tina Fey.

What we didn’t hear (at least until later) was that the sum was actually somewhere between $190,000 and $200,000 and that it included some $40,000 for her secessionist hubby (who doesn’t appear to like the country but seems to like the country’s political donor’s money just fine), and thousands more on outfits for her kids who were apparently sporting brand new Gucci shoes while disrupting business on the erstwhile Straight Talk Express which according to one staffer was at times more like the “Baby Poop Express”. (what’s next  breast feeding while attending to a visiting foreign dignitary? and no, I’m not bashing motherhood or women here – just Palin and her clearly compromised sense of what is reasonable.)

The Gucci shoes in particular when coupled with what the children where apparently dressed like prior to the spree resulted in the creative but apparently appropriate moniker “the Wasilla Hillbillies” which so funny and so on beam that when I heard it what I was drinking literally came out my nose as I snorted in laughter.

From what I understand Palin had to buy and then the campaign staff had to schlep 13 new suitcases to carry all the clothing she purchased from one place to the next during the tour.  Not only is this unfair, ludicrous and irresponsible it also begs the question – if she wasn’t planning on keeping it (as she claimed on national television where she said that after the campaign it would be donated to charity) why would she have spent so much money on suitcases to pack it all around with her?  (and you can bet that she didn’t buy those suitcases at Wal-Mart either.  It wouldn’t surprise me if they came from Louis Vuitton or maybe Tumi.

So has any reporter bothered to track where the clothes went after the bus had pulled into the garage and the sun set on McCains last big battle?

Not that I’ve heard.

What I want to know is if the Gucci shoes the kids are sporting went to a deserving inner-city youth from the projects or if they now sit mud stained and damp in some mudroom in the Governer’s mansion in Alaska?  And what about all the suits she bought her hubby not to mention the tailored pink and beige suits she wore herself?  Did she hang onto them once again breaking her word to the very people she claims to wish to serve?  If not then I’m sure that she should be able to tell us which charity they went to?  After all such publicity would be good for the charity wouldn’t it?

My bet is that those thirteen bags (whatever brand they turn out to be) was delivered to Palin’s residence within a few days (if not a few hours) of her arrival back home and that their contents are now safely ensconced in the WB’s newly expanded clothes closets.

What makes this whole clothing issue all that much worse (and far more worrisome from the perspective of her future political ambitions) is that again according to McCain staff this spree was “one step shy of stealing”.

According to the unnamed source a wealthy McCain supporter had given Palin a credit card to use for the purpose of purchasing 3 suits for the Republican National Convention.  The staffer reports that this was the extent of the permission that Palin was given and that upon seeing the receipts for the nearly $200,000 in charges the donor was shocked beyond words.

As a country that is reeling from the collective shocks that commenced with the subprime mortgage crises and which have now extended to the financial markets, the banking system, the automotive industry and soon to the credit card companies too – a country saddled with a nearly incomprehensible national debt and a budget deficit that is hard to imagine let alone manage, it hardly demonstrates the sort of restraint or fiscal responsibility that we need in a leader when the first chance she gets she basically steals from a campaign contributor and goes off on a buying extravaganza like an oil-rich third world dictator at a Russian arms bazaar.

Seriously.

All humor aside though, this is very troubling.  There are still some people – let’s call them “right wing nut jobs” that haven’t realized that this woman is not only stupid she is dangerously unhinged.  She is clearly corrupt without apology, has the ethics of a Bush-Rice hybrid, and the IQ of Dan Qualye with a head injury. It is obvious that rules are something that only apply to other people and that the only laws that you break and the ones where you got caught breaking them.  She appears to believe that power is to be used for personal gain and that being elected to a high station gives one certain inalienable rights to mistreat other people and to use that power expressly for personal gain (or worse, personal and/or vindictive satisfaction) as well as for enforcing her personal religous doctrine (which is a far cry from sane let alone reasonable) upon anyone and everyone – and God forbid she (or her whack job preacher decide that you’re a witch which could literally mean your life is in jeopardy.

All I can say is thank God McCain lost.  I said it before but it was worth saying again.  Now let’s just hope that people don’t forget the bullshit she pulled this time around when 2012 comes up.  Provided that we’re all still here and that neither a pole shift nor the crossing of Nibiru cause a global cataclysm that renders all elections superfluous because you can count on her trotting out that bs folksy enunciation and that false-as-hell wink because the truth is that Palin is just dumb enough to believe that she’s got the people fooled.

Please, oh, please don’t let’s prove her right.

This just hit my in box from the Forbes/Adify Blog Advertising Network:

I am writing to you with some urgency because our partners at Adify have proposed a short-term campaign for us to run across the Forbes.com Business & Finance Blog Network.
The campaign is very unique in that it is political in nature and may potentially be objectionable to some readers.  We ask that you please take the time to consider whether  you’d like this advertisement to run on your site. It is up to you to decide whether you will accept this campaign.
Some details on the campaign:

The campaign advocates a “Yes”  vote on California Proposition 8, which touches on some potentially sensitive  issues related to familial values and marriage.  Specifically, a “Yes”  vote on Proposition 8 advocates a ban on gay marriage in California.

The campaign will run only in the  300×250 ad size and will feature a video similar to a political television  commercial.

The campaign is Geo-targeted  exclusively to the state of California.

The overall CA-only campaign CPM  is  $2.85 to you.
We are hoping to set this campaign live ASAP as it only runs until November 4th – election day.
To provide you with an opt-out/reject opportunity for this single campaign, Adify has rejected this campaign across our Network. It will appear in your rejected area, at which time you could choose to accept it. We’ve been assured by Adify that the ad WILL NOT automatically serve on your site.”  You can preview the video for this campaign in your Adify account as well.
Please let me know if you have any questions- feel free to call my cell phone listed below.
Have a nice weekend.

My Response:

I do not wish this advertisement or any like it to run on my site.  I believe that all people should have equal rights under the law and any law that discriminates on the basis of gender, age, race or sexual preference is both wrong and unconstitutional.  Further I find the advocacy for such a law personally abhorrent.  People should not be limited in their rights simply because other people don’t like their choices.  Whom a person chooses for their partner whether be it for sex or for life has no impact on others so why should those other people that are not impacted in any way have the right to make a determination about the rights of anyone else?

I personally think that Sarah Palin is an imbecile. I simply cannot imagine a country with her as its Vice President let alone its President.  In fact I think this would be enormously detrimental to all Americans in so many ways it is difficult to imagine, much less quantify in any rational way.  This however, is simply my opinion and I do not grudge others their own opinions even if it is different than mine.  Further, I don’t strive to limit the rights of those with a different opinion their opportunity to exercise their right to choose the candidate of their preference even though this choice will have much greater bearing on me and my life than anyone’s choice about whom they marry.

Why this is even a question boggles my mind.  What small minded fear-based bigoted self-righteous meddling moron would spend time, money, or waste the public’s limited attention span on something so totally inconsequential as limiting the rights of people that make different choices to choose whom they wish to lawfully engage in matrimony?  Don’t we have bigger problems than a couple of men or a couple of women choosing to live in a respectful and loving relationship?

This is a modern day witch hunt.  Make no mistake about it.  These same do-gooder right wing Christians are the exact same morons whom a century or two ago were the ones having witch hunts and burning blacks on crosses and before that they were the ones that were holding the inquisitioner’s hearings in Spain.

Shame on Forbes for even considering this ill-intentioned campaign and shame on any blogger whom either out of misguided beliefs or worse, simply for a few dollars would choose to display any of the rhetoric this group espouses.

Sincerely,

Oliver W Starr

We all thought that Shrub was the stupidest person to ever ascend to the Oval Office but it now appears that it is possible – likely even – that some time in the next four years we will be victim to someone even dumber than the current presiding potted plant actually inheriting the position of Commander in Chief.

Now, I’m not writing to discuss the reasons why this might happen – save to say that if the democrats are so stupid that they don’t get their shit together and put an end to the republican voter fraud this time around then they deserve to lose this election.  No, I just want to prep you for what we ought to prepare for under a Palin Presidency.

Nations with morons as heads of state have long been the butt of jokes based upon the idiocy of their leaders so with a leader so clueless that she doesn’t even have a clue that she’s clueless (so clueless it turns out that McCain staffers have revealed that she didn’t know that Africa was a continent!) we should expect no less from our friends abroad.

With that in mind I thought I’d give you just one example of the sort of humor that we should be prepared to “enjoy”.

Here’s a funny:

The leaders of China, Russia and the US are discussing their space programs.  The Chinese leader says “in two years we will put a man on the moon.”  Russia’s leader, Putin, ups the ante by saying “Really?  In five years Mother Russia will put a man on Mars.”  President Palin, not wanting to be outdone by either man says “Well, Gosh Darn it Boys, that’s real impressive, but’chya  know what we’re gonna do?  The Good ‘Ol USA is gonna put a team of men and women on the sun!”

The Russian and Chinese leaders are stunned.  Putin looks at President Palin and says “But certainly you know this is impossible.  It would be a suicide mission!”

Palin derisively rolls her eyes, winks at the audience and says “Well Mr. Smarty Pants, that shows what you know.  We’re going to land at night!”*

Oh the horror!  Somebody wake me please and tell me this is all a bad dream.  With so many smart people in this country is this lineup really the best we could possibly do?  Sad, sad, sad…

*Yes, this is my own original humor.

I recently wrote Jane Harman, one of the state congressional representatives from California. I got a reply to my original letter – a form response that was dated four months prior to the date I sent the letter.

This bothered me and finally I decided to respond to that form letter with something a bit more direct. It seems that Mr. Harman cares a great deal about what her constituents have to say. So much so that her email address doesn’t even work. Nice. That’s one way to turn a deaf ear to the voter.

I hope you’ll all join me in showing her and those like her like that loud-mouthed do-nothing Nancy Pelosi that have squandered their political capital and our good faith by completely failing to accomplish anything that they promised and for which we voted them into office that we won’t tolerate being lied to and that we don’t give second chances.

When these folks come up for re-election let’s send them packing. It’s just too bad we can’t fire them on the spot. Politics are amazing. There are few jobs on the planet where you can fail so spectacularly for so long and still collect your pay check every month. It seems to me based upon the last few years that we need a new system that gives the voters a more immediate means of removing from office non-performing individuals. Anyone have any ideas?

Anyway, for those that are curious, below are my choice words for Representative Harman:

This is an automatically generated Delivery Status Notification.

Delivery to the following recipients failed.

CA36IMA.PUB@mail.house.gov


From: Oliver Starr
Date: Thu, 02 Oct 2008 06:02:15 -0700
To: “Rep. Jane Harman”
Subject: Re: your message

Dear Representative Harman,

Thanks so much for your form letter in response to my original statement of
concern for a number of issues that are profoundly influencing every man,
woman and child in this country.

At this point all I can say is that every one of you should be fired. You
have failed to do your jobs, failed to protect our troops, failed to
regulate wall street and failed to support the working middle class.

Now you are all pushing for a bail out of the richest one percent in this
country simply because they made bad bets and now can’t pay what they owe.

How ironic that those of us that pay our taxes, pay our mortgages on time
and scrape and scrimp to make ends meet and maybe have dinner out or go to
the movies once in a while are being forced – not asked mind you but
required to bail out a group of executives that spend more on lunch each day
than some families can afford to spend on food for a week.

It’s amazing that as a group these executives who ran their companies into
the ground are so incapable of accepting responsibility for their own
actions that they would rather see their companies bankrupted and closed
down then take one dime’s cut in their multi-million dollar golden parachute
severance plans. Don’t people that ruin their companies get fired for
cause? When fired for cause should a person still be eligible to collect a
multi-million dollar severance? To me that seems ridiculous. If I screw up
and mess up my company do I get a severance package? Does the government
come and bail me out?

Does congress hold a special session and try to figure out how to save me
and my business and guarantee that if I have to walk I will do so with
enough money that neither I nor my heirs will ever have to work another day
in this lifetime? Ha! Don’t make me laugh.

Doesn’t it seem strange to you that the person architecting this bailout
used to run one of the firms that has gone bust? Or that his personal
fortune from that firm is in excess of 700 million dollars? Did you not
think that perhaps some of the decisions that actually caused his firm to
blow up were made on his watch? And now you expect us to hand over roughly
a trillion dollars – that is $2300 for every man, woman and child in this
country to this same incompetent idiot who is insisting upon no oversight?

Why is that? What is he so afraid of? What will be hidden from the eyes of
the world if he gets his way? Just how stupid do you think we are? (I guess
that last is a redundant question, after all, collectively we are dumber
than cattle having elected Bush (twice though both victories are highly
questionable), Pelosi (though I don’t think we’ll be seeing her for a second
term) and even you – who can’t be bothered to reply to letters even with a
form letter that is up to date. Pathetic.)

In any case I don’t expect that you’ll actually read this – I’m sure that
you pawn this sort of stuff off to some lackey of yours, most likely a
college intern that knows about as much about the real world as anyone
subsidized by mommy and daddy is likely to.

So if I know that you won’t read this and that even if you do the only
response I’ll get is another piece of crap form letter, just why am I
writing this at all? Because I intend to republish it on several blogs that
get upwards of a million visitors a month. Collectively they add up to
several million unique viewers, certainly enough to have an impact on a
vote.

So now the question you should be asking is “what can I do to make these
people decide not to vote me out of office?” Well, I’m not going to help
you out with that one Ms. Harman. After all, we hired you to do a job you
promised us you were capable of doing. So far you haven’t demonstrated the
sort of competency that we require which makes you look pretty dishonest in
the eyes of most of the public.

At any rate, if you want another term I sincerely suggest that you start
showing us some of the things you promised during your campaign. We’re
tired of this war, we’re tired of our rights being trammeled and the
Constitution and the Bill of Rights being shredded by the President’s
poisoned pen. We’re tired of a limp wristed majority leader that looks like
the biggest liar since Nixon and we’re tired of our money being used in ways
that we never approved and don’t believe is right.

Today if you ask the average person if they feel like their government is
acting in the best interest of the people or in their own selfish well being
and that of their fat cat friends I think you know what most of us would
say.

Once a long time ago people got sick and tired of their taxes being used in
ways contrary to their interests. They called it taxation without
representation. Eventually they got so pissed off about it that they had a
party and started a revolution.

Ask yourself this? How much longer do you think we’re going to take this
crap before we start a revolution of our own? And who’s heads will be on
the pikes first do you think? We are tired of the duplicity and we’re sick
to death of the good ol’ boy war profiteering network. We’re sick of the
lobbyists and the no bid contracts and of handing out our hard earned
dollars to the most selfish and least deserving. We’re tired of a
do-nothing congress that cow tows to an out of control pseudo dictator that
has no respect for the people the Constitution or this country, and we’re
pretty sick of photo copied responses to letters like this.

You have been warned.

Sincerely,

Oliver Starr