If you can’t play with your toys properly, they get taken away. That’s the clear lesson we should all learn from the recent idiocy in Australia where it seems a few folks with IQ’s at least a standard deviation below the mean got a hold of a couple of green lasers and had their fun by pointing them at passing aircraft.

Reuter’s Oddly Enough reports that unidentified hooligans - I’d suggest the term MORONS if you ask me - decided that aiming laser pointers at aircraft was a good way to pass the time. After several pilots reported beams entering the cockpits of their planes during landing and takeoff maneuvers and one air ambulance helicopter reported being briefly blinded in flight the Australian authorities have had enough.

Now, merely carrying a laser pointer without the appropriate permits can result in a 14 year (yes, that is ten plus four years) in prison time for a first offense.

Thanks a lot guys. Your brilliance has done wonders for your fellow man. Of course the Australian authorities who think that merely carrying a laser pointer is a capital offense need to come to a big US state prison facility and see the kind of folks we lock up. The guys with the laser pointers can just spend a week here and that would teach them quick enough. I guarantee it. Don’t you have enough crime over there in Australia to make it ludicrous to house someone and feed them at taxpayers expense for nearly a decade and a half all for carring a battery powered lightstick? For crying out loud, we’re not even talking about pointing them at planes; just carrying the darn things. What’s next? Putting people with glo-sticks on a chain gang?

Nice job, morons! Nice response moronic authorities…

Okay, I have a bit of a mystery and it’s driving me nuts. I’m a bit of a laser nerd. I collect a fairly wide range of DPSS handheld and larger Argon bench lasers. Among the things I do with them (aside from wasting prodigious amounts of time) is a form of projection laser microscopy that I’ve sort of developed hacked into being.

Over the past year I’ve been observing some very curious creatures with this apparatus I’ve created. They’re tiny, they’re ugly, they’re mean to each other and if they were much bigger they’d scare the crap out of me. Really. They scare me enough as it is and they’re smaller than a single human red blood cell (I know, I checked…anything in the name of science).

From observing and filming them extensively, I have come to believe that these are very complex lifeforms, clearly multicellular, and they even exhibit some fairly advanced behavioral characteristics (I am totally serious).

The problem is that I cannot identify them. Not family, not genus, not species, not phylum, class, or even order…heck they could be aliens for all I know. What I do know is that I have been uable to find them in any microbiology text, any book on insects or arachnids, no crustacean book either, even the all knowing info-god Google has let me down so I am turning to you, my smart readers for help. Please help me find out what the hell these things are!!!!!

More video of these terrifying critters can be found here
Photos of them can be found here Thank You.